TURNING OVER AND OVER

TURNING OVER AND OVER: It’s hard to say it wasn’t with a degree of weary glee that we watched some of the finally-beaten-down, bible-thumping wackos try one last time to stick their noses into the crotches of same gender couples as the civil unions bill passed out of one final committee hearing.

But the fact that it took years to beat back a handful of church-zombies showed, if nothing else, the vapid nature of most of the legislators in Hawai`i who needed to be shown at the actual voting polls what the telephone polls showed all along.

The thing is that this time the only argument the religion-addled had left was one that they were actually right about- this separate but equal half-measure is ultimately insulting and shameful to everyone in the state and many won’t rest until same gender marriage is the law of the land.

Although we can’t imagine why anyone would want the state to get involved in their relationships, as a civil rights issue it’s well past time for full marriage rights for those that are into that kind of kinky paperwork.

But now that these busybodies have way too much time on their hands again we’re about to go through the whole thing, with the same cast, all over again on the Death With Dignity Bill (SB 803) which was “held” after a hearing Monday, reportedly effectively killing it once again this year.

The bill says it:

Allows a terminally ill, competent adult to receive medication to end life. Prohibits mercy killings, lethal injections, and active euthanasia. Requires informed consent. Allows alternate doctor to replace attending doctor if latter declines to prescribe. Provides immunity from civil and criminal liability for acts taken in good faith. Imposes penalties for unauthorized altering, forging, concealing, destroying, or exerting undue influence in making or rescinding a request for medication. Requires monitor at time of taking dose.

Many of the same entrenched gutless wonders- who didn’t trust, much less know, their own constituency and quaked in their boots at the thought of losing their precious legislative seats if they did the right thing on civil unions- are back allowing the same religious crazies hijack the bill that would allow terminal patients with less than six months to live to avoid the pain and suffering of a prolonged dying process- should they freely chose to do so.

It’s essentially the same issue as civil unions- one of civil rights. The question in both cases is who owns our bodies- us or the god squad.

The problem here is obvious. While it took years, it was an effort to put a human face on the civil unions issue with happy smiling families coming out, so to speak, that made the hate-mongering of the opponents not just apparent but unsettling enough to cause people to vote out the vile opponents in the last election.

But who is to speak for the dead and dying? A corpse who was forced to suffer needlessly tells no tales. And if it did it wouldn’t be as pretty a picture as young, healthy, same gender couples many with children in tow, simply asking for the same future as everyone else.

THROWN OVERBOARD

THROWN OVERBOARD: Most county employees we’ve heard from are still quietly seething over their politically motivated furloughs last year with their ire about equally split between the mayor, the council and their union.

But after seeing tomorrow’s council agenda one group that must be positively apoplectic is the county’s lifeguards.

For those who missed the circus, when furloughs were first discussed Mayor Bernard Carvalho assured the council the “public safety employees” would not be furloughed.

But, long story short, they were- including non-sworn officers in the Kaua`i Police Department (KPD), which caused all kinds of constipation as the prosecutor’s office, already backed up by the furloughs in the state courts, had to begin letting people loose people KPD had arrested because they couldn’t process them as fast as the law required.

After a huge fight over whether money for the prosecutor’s office to “catch up” on the backlog- supposedly created by furloughs- was truly “related to furloughs” (as the bill’s “purpose” stated) the money was included in the bill.

The lifeguards, however were not so lucky. During the first committee meeting on the bill to end furloughs, lifeguard champion Dr. Monty Downs described how, while lifeguards are part of the fire department for administrative purposes- where they were finally placed a while back after years of being what many called “second class heroes”- for union representation, unlike firemen they are stuck in some obscure backwater bargaining unit in Honolulu.

Somehow that left them out of being considered “public safety” employees and, through a series of screw ups and political maneuverings, they were left, not with furloughs but accepting the 5% pay cuts that the rest of their bargaining unit accepted, even while other counties didn’t screw their lifeguards.

But when Downs asked to do what was fair and promised and give them back the 5% that had been stolen from them in the screw up, the council decided that this was not “related to furloughs” and anyway the bill was “looking forward” even though the prosecutor’s office was getting money to clean up the mess left by furloughs in the past.

But "never fear" councilmembers promised- we can take that up in a new bill, which they promised, would be introduced at the next council meeting.

And guess what doesn’t appear on tomorrow’s council agenda? A money bill to make the lifeguards whole like the rest of the public safety workers.

This wouldn’t be the first time that assurances given during council debate are forgotten when the gavel bangs and the meeting adjourned.

You can reach councilmembers at councilmembers@kauai.gov and ask them why they’ve seemingly forgotten the lifeguards.

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The House Judiciary Committee has scheduled a Thursday, February 10, 2011, 2:00 p.m. hearing on HB 343 (Status) which would allow election day voter registration.

Advance registration is an anachronism and more and more states have gone to same day registration without any problems.

If you care about voter turnout this bill is essential.

As always testimony can be emailed to JUDtestimony@capitol.hawaii.gov or submitted via the web at http://www.capitol.hawaii.gov/emailtestimony and must include the testifier's name with position/title and organization, the committee the comments are directed to, the date and time of the hearing and the measure number.

THINKING INSIDE THE ENVELOPMENT

THINKING INSIDE THE ENVELOPMENT: Leave it to a joke-of-a-legislator like Jimmy Tokioka to introduce a joke-of-a-bill to take care of a no-joke problem.

The matter of guide books that list places from which we routinely have to drag dead tourists isn’t new. It’s been the subject of many more than a handful of county council discussions over the past decade or so with emergency room Dr. Monty Downs leading the way in pushing the Kaua`i Visitors’ Bureau (KVB) to get off their duffs and put pressure on the authors to de-list the most demonstrably dangerous locations after his umpteenth time of having to go out and “inform” an Ultimate Guide Book-clutching family that their loved one(s) didn’t make it.

Admittedly the way to go about fixing it isn’t passing a law to allow lawsuits against writers if they irrelevantly include instructions that urge trespassing in some kind of absurd end run around the actual problem.

But nonetheless it’s a subject which predictably brought out the usual gang of sociopaths, blaming the victims and assuring us that they would never be so stupid- while giving evidence to the contrary with every post.

We invite them- and the two “newspaper” editors who predictably screamed about first amendment rights- to call Dr. Downs. We’re sure he’d be happy to invite them over to the hospital next time the ambulance is on the way so they can watch him pull the sheet over a bloated corpse that was a vibrant individual an hour before. Perhaps he’ll let them inform the family.

Of course we wouldn’t think of criticizing something without offering a solution.

We’ve been hypercritical of the obscene amount of money that the county council throws at KVB without any accountability just so they can be seen as providing money to the tourist trade- the old gush and flush.

So, our solution? Two words: bubble wrap.

That’s right, bubble wrap. We simply get the airlines to greet every arriving passenger and swathe them in bubble wrap.

And it need not be that cumbersome a process like piecing sections together with duct tape or something. With county funds the KVB could simply offer a contract for zip-up, reusable, bubble wrap suits, prefabricated and read to wear... off the rack so to speak.

We’ll still need legislation to force them to wear them at all times but at least that kind of law would address the issue head on. Of course we’ll have to exempt those with a local driver’s license since we never do stupid things.

Or maybe KVB could publish a warning list of dangerous specific references in specific guidebooks and distribute them to deplaning visitors. Afterall, the answer to free speech is more free speech.

Nah, that would be too easy. Besides they’re too busy finding ways to waste the money to keep a list like that. And it might pop the real bubble- the obligatory promotional impression given by the tourism industry that you can leave your caution at home because nothing bad could possibly happen in “paradise.”

Bubble-wrapping is the kind of creative thinking Kaua`i needs. We’re frankly surprised it hasn’t been proposed already at the anonymous dimwit roundtable, which is already in regress.

WRONG PLACE, RIGHT TIME

WRONG PLACE, RIGHT TIME: Today’s 3 p.m. State Senate hearing of a bill (SB 1460) that would make “possession of one ounce or less of marijuana... a civil violation for that is subject to a fine of not more than $100” got some press today.

That joint hearing of the Senate Judiciary and Labor and Health Committees took up a measure that would not only decriminalize possession of less than an ounce but also eliminate a lot of other inappropriate and draconian penalties like requiring substance abuse treatment and eliminating any “intent to distribute” charges for simple possession of pakalolo.

(Update: SB1460 passed JDL/HTH 5-0 and now goes to Ways and Means [WAM])

Also on the agenda at the same meeting was a hearing on the much publicized bill (SB1458) which among other things would establish licensure for “medical marijuana compassion center license for the sale of medical marijuana to qualified patients.”

You can submit late testimony and track the two measures but for many the real action this year is in a bill being heard next week to transfer jurisdiction of medical marijuana from the Department of Public Safety to the Department of Health (DOH).

Bill SB175 would do what should have been done when the legislature first legalized medical cannabis- something done in all other states that allow the practice- instead of setting up the seeming contradictory placement of a legal use under a department that deals with illegal matters.

That has resulted in rules that provide lists of patients to be circulated and kept by law enforcement and allows for preemptive, warrantless raids on patients homes without probable cause and even an incident of the release of a list to the press on the Big Island.

The bill would require all new administrative rules under DOH and eliminate the absurd and potentially abusive oversight of the program by those who actually oppose medical marijuana.

This could be the year after an aborted attempt last session under former Governor Linda Lingle.

The bill is on the agenda for a joint hearing of the Senate’s Committee On Public Safety, Government Operations, And Military Affairs and the Committee On Health, next Tuesday, February 8 at 2:45 p.m. You can track the bill here.

Those wishing to testify can email it to PGMTestimony@Capitol.hawaii.gov, making sure to include the measure, date and time of the hearing.

Easier still is the automatic handy-dandy, fill-in-the-blank email page the Senate provides at http://www.capitol.hawaii.gov/emailtestimony/.
And some good news. Though it still has to get through the Senate Judiciary Committee, Senate Bill 174 has already quietly passed out of the Committee on Health. It would “(r)emoves marijuana and tetrahydrocannabinols from the schedule I controlled substances list and places them in the schedule III controlled substances list”.

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Update: Despite testimony in overwhelming support of the bill (which we detailed on Monday) to select county ethics board members from a list provided by an independent body from Common Cause Hawaii, The League Of Women Voters Of Hawai`i, Americans for Democratic Action/Hawai`i, Rolf Bieber, Larry Geller, Richard Spacer and PNN- and no testimony in outright opposition- HB468 was deferred after last Tuesday’s House Judiciary Committee.

However, the Senate Public Safety, Government Operations, and Military Affairs (PGM) Committee has scheduled a public hearing on the companion bill SB214 a week from tomorrow- Saturday 2/12- at 9:00AM. The senate is probably where the action will be on this one since it was introduced by six senators whereas the house version was introduced by only one representative.

If you sent testimony to the house please resend it to the Senate PMG committee at PGMTestimony@Capitol.hawaii.gov. If you didn’t, now is your chance. As always include the measure, date and time of the hearing. Or use the email page the Senate provides at http://www.capitol.hawaii.gov/emailtestimony/.

GOOD EVENING LADIES AND GERMS

GOOD EVENING LADIES AND GERMS: A characteristic trait of the true babooze is the reluctance to let facts get in the way of a good babble.

So now that we’ve dispensed with the preliminaries we can get down the real idiocy behind Babooze-In-Chief Mel Rapozo’s demagoguing of the plastic grocery bag ban.

Because had Rapozo actually tried to find out whether the claims that reusable bags carry pathogens that can cause disease are true he would have found that they were “just baloney.”

At least according to the respected independent publication Consumer Reports’ “Safety Blog,”

Turns out that media hysteria over bad bugs in reusable bags came from a study conducted with funding from- you’ve probably guessed already- the plastic bag industry.

“Which is why” said the article,

“we’re not so swayed by a recent report about reusable grocery bags and their potential to make you sick.

The report came out of the University of Arizona, Tucson and Loma Linda University in California. Smack on page one is this note: “The authors would like to acknowledge and thank the American Chemistry Council for providing funding to support this study.”

The American Chemistry Council is the trade group that advocates on behalf of plastic-bag manufacturers. Now why would the folks who make plastic grocery bags want to cast doubts on the safety of reusable grocery bags? Oh, right.”

After pointing out that the study was based on a grand total of 84 bags the article says that:

The researchers tested for pathogenic bacteria Salmonella and Listeria, but didn’t find any, nor did they find strains of E. coli that could make one sick. They only found bacteria that don’t normally cause disease, but do cause disease in people with weakened immune systems.

Our food-safety experts were underwhelmed as well. “A person eating an average bag of salad greens gets more exposure to these bacteria than if they had licked the insides of the dirtiest bag from this study,” says Michael Hansen, senior staff scientist at Consumers Union. “These bacteria can be found lots of places, so no need to go overboard.”

But Hansen notes that there are some reminders to take away from the study. It’s easy to spread bacteria from meat, fish, or poultry to other foods – in your kitchen or in your grocery bags. So we do think it’s wise to carry those items in disposable bags. Reusable bags are fine for most everything else, but it’s a good idea to wash them occasionally.

And of course the current ordinance on Kaua`i specifically exempts the bags used for vegetables and meats anyway.

We’re not suggesting that campaign contributions from places like Safeway Inc., the Kauai Beverage & Ice Cream Co., Ltd or Randall Francisco, the head of the Chamber of Commerce- which was the only entity that strenuously opposed the bill- influenced Rapozo’s decision to reverse the ban... but they couldn’t have hurt.

The fact is that the “amendment,” as currently written, would allow every single supermarket on the island to go back to those white plastic grocery bags when, first the original bill provided for bags for individual items like meats and produce and second, if people use common sense and wash out their reusable bags when they spill stuff in them there’s no health or sanitation issue.

Are we a bunch of baboozes who don’t have the smarts to know how to keep our food safe?

Well, apparently it takes one to know one.

ONE WORD BEN: PLASTICS

ONE WORD BEN: PLASTICS: Back before late ’08 when the bottom fell out of the free-for-all, credit-spawned, consumerism bubble it was common to hear people bemoan the gobble, gobble, gobble of your typical over fed, too-much-stuff turkey-American.

But in spite of the hope of many that perhaps the crash presaged a new era of right-sized consumption, we’ve gone right back to our old, traditional, grab-it-while-you-can rituals, like Coneheads demanding the restoration of our right to “consume mass quantities”.

And as if to underline the way that, when challenged to do the very least we can do- and we mean the very least- we act like whiny, weaned infants demanding the restoration of our endless supply of teat.

So it shouldn’t be any surprise that, backed by a wave of sniveling, self-centered assholes, Councilperson Mel Rapozo is trying to make sure the baby has his bottle by reversing the ban on plastic grocery bags that went into effect last month.

And make no mistake about it. This would be a reversal.

According to Joan Conrow’s post yesterday the bill would exempt “Food Service Establishment(s)” and defines them as

any building, vehicle, place, or structure, or any room or division in a building, vehicle, place, or structure where food is prepared, served, or sold for immediate consumption on or in the vicinity of the premises; called for or taken out by customers; or prepared prior to being delivered to another location for consumption. This term includes, but not limited to restaurants; coffee shops; cafeterias; short-order cafes; luncheonettes; taverns; lunchrooms; places which manufacture wholesale or retail sandwiches or salads; institutions, both public and private; food carts; itinerant restaurants; industrial cafeterias; and catering establishments.

That of course means that every supermarket with a “deli” on the island is exempt, as is any place that “prepares food” even if all you do is serve coffee.

This is supposedly about “health issues” and maintaining “sanitary conditions” but it’s anything but.

What kind of slobs are these people that they can’t make sure their takeout doesn’t spill all over the place without rewrapping it in a plastic grocery bag? Don’t forget that those plastic bags that people use to wrap fruits an veges and meats are already exempt.

But that’s not enough for your fat, pre-diabetic ass? You obviously need all that greasy, fat-laden gravy on your nutritionless white rice but are you such freakin’ pigs that you can’t get your slop from the store into your pie hole without spilling it all over your morbidly obese lap?
All that plastic that the deli wraps your food in isn’t enough for ya, eh? You need another bag to put it all in, in anticipation of the fact that you’re in such a rush to cram more garbage down your gullet that can’t get out of the store without spilling it on you $500 designer jeans.

Health? If you cared about health you wouldn’t be eating all that processed pre-prepared crap and go home and cook a real meal.

Sanitation? You mean after you’re careless enough to let your stuff spill out into the bag you’re so intent on getting every last drop into that gaping maw of yours that you’ve gotta lick the bag?

Perhaps the most ridiculous aspect of this bellyaching gripe session that’s been going on since the ban is that it comes from people who claim to be nature lovers and even environmental activists.

If you love your plastic grocery bags so much why don’t you go live in the Texas-sized plastic bag gyre out in the middle of the Pacific? Perhaps you should go on a diet of the shearwaters, dolphins and turtles the bags kill.

If you can’t live without your nasty plastic grocery bags maybe we should make ones big enough to wrap you in when we bury you in the ground... we wouldn’t want to spill you and make a mess on the way to the cemetery.

A SPLENDID TIME IS GUARANTEED FOR ALL

A SPLENDID TIME IS GUARANTEED FOR ALL: We’ve got to admit severe ambivalence when it comes to Mayor Bernard Carvalho’s administration’s attempts to control its message, especially with the recent ramp-up of command and control.

While we’d like to say we admire the effort purely for it’s Machiavellian efficiency it’s often done with such bumblingly transparent obfuscation and manipulation that it’s bound to infuriate the public to a level in precise one-to-one ratio with the effort to maintain secrecy.

Yesterday’s press release announcing a Thursday “meeting to discuss the county's plans for an adolescent drug treatment center on Kaua`i” quotes Carvalho’s Anti-Drug Coordinator Theresa Koki as saying that:

“After a long search and consideration of many factors, we have narrowed the location of the adolescent drug treatment center down to two proposed sites in central Kaua`i (and w)e invite the community to come to the meeting on Thursday and be a part of this important discussion.”

And where exactly would those two locations be? The release pointedly leaves out that information.

Well if you wanted to make sure that the people who live next door to the proposed center won’t show up to make humbug the best way is to not tell them their neighborhood is targeted.

The problem is that then you’re assured to get them so pissed off at having to read in the paper Friday that they missed the meeting when it was announced it would be in their neighborhood, that they will fight tooth and nail against it

Let’s not forget that the last attempt to site the treatment center at the old dog pound was exacerbated by the fact that many in the Hanapepe community found out about the location only after it was a “done deal.” Adding that factor to the obvious one of putting our kids in a place that was no longer fit for dogs to occupy, put rejection of the plan over the top when residents rose up against former Mayor Bryan Baptiste for his lack of consultation with residents in the area.

And make no mistake- the lack of any indication of the locations was no oversight.

As if to make sure that it’s clear to everyone what the issues are and how they are being intentionally kept in the dark the release says:

“A recent series of meetings focusing on the critical need to provide these services for our youth has made us hopeful that the so-called “NIMBY” issues are behind us and that our community is ready to move forward on behalf of our kids,” said the mayor.

So just to assure that if there is any good will for the project they destroy it by manipulating the process.

Just to make sure though we asked Koki in an email this morning, “Can you tell me where the two adolescent treatment center alternatives are? Or are you refusing to release that information before the meeting?”

Her answer confirmed the flim-flam saying, “You are correct that the two alternatives will be discussed the night of the meeting.”

Apparently Koki couldn’t do more to make sure that this latest effort at siting the facility is a complete and utter failure if she tried.

First of all selecting two sites insures that the two communities will be pitted against each other throughout the process. Just look at the process of siting of the new landfill which, when it went through an “open process” that turned out to be anything but, was a complete bust. But when the administration announced that they had decided to pick a site, give the reasons and be done with it, we’ve heard little to no protest, especially about the way it was selected.

That’s what we elect a leader to do- make decisions. They may not always be popular ones but most people will give the leader credit for making one, especially when a problem like the landfill- or the drug treatment facility- siting has lingered for literally decades.

Just be honest and open about it.

But to hold a meeting where the ultimate “stakeholders” are not even told they have been selected insures a sour taste in their mouths when they learn that they have been picked- and that they missed the meeting where it was discussed.

That’s the way to ensure that this whole process gets off on the wrong foot and that there will be lingering animosity throughout the process.

It would all be funny if it weren’t so pathetic. Can’t anyone here play this game?

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Note: Our copy editor will be off island for the next two week. Now you’ll know how sloppy we really are. We apologize in advance for any typos or errors.